Way too many questions !!!


​I have been thinking a lot about the entire episode. Where it went wrong or did it even. Was it me or was it you?

Did I assume a lot on my front or did you just hide something you shouldn’t have !

I understood you so well and I cared for you. I was confident about your nature and my confidence made you feel happy. You got through the tough times.

Initially I took it as my purpose to get you to your dream and it did happen. I am not sure if that was how it was happened and irrespective of me or someone else, you would have nailed it.

I am not able to pin down on what exactly is bothering me.

Is it that – why did I ever think that it was going to be us ?

Is that why am I unable to settle down with a composed feeling ?

Is the point that I missed on the important fact about you having a boyfriend?

Or is it that I am trying to find a means to blame it on you for hiding it?

Or is it that I am trying to find a perfect explanation for it and I do have that but I am not able to accept it in completeness!

If we being together was for a purpose then is it still going to be ?

I need to just get it through my head and listen to my voices.

I never thought anything romantic about you. I didn’t think anything. But you sure are an amazing person. The fact that I found someone who thinks a lot like me might be a reason I got so connected and that’s well understood.

I may be then after so much speculation – worried about if it is going to persist?

Are we going to stay friends for long ?

Is your hero going to accept it ? Am I worried about the future and separation?

Is it because I have seen examples in past of separation with people whom I had great connections?

Is it because people can’t accept or events break relationships(romantic or otherwise) !!

Am I worried that I focus in the present and I continue to be with you the way I am and one day an event will shatter it down completely – either from your end or mine ?

And then what will happen of me or for that matter what will happen of you ?

I know no one has control of future, but I have been through it all and everytime I think it’s different but the result is same and I am making an attempt to deal it well. So ?

What is it exactly?

Why am I so unsettling about this..

What is that even if I have an explanation I cannot come down to a concrete thoughts?

Because I don’t have your voice on this ?

Because I feel that you feel that separation is inevitable?

Is it because currently you have a strong connection at your front and I am currently not attached anywhere ?

Or is it that we have never been in touch face to face ?

Is it the classic dilemma of being so close yet so far away that never exists?

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