Social Dilemma – A Man whose Wife Can’t Conceive

A boy falls in love with the most pretty girl in college. She is charming and brilliant. She scores ace in her subjects. She likes him too and they get along as time goes on. They grow and with them love grows. As fairy tales would have it, they get married. They both work hard and make quite some living. Life goes on well and nothing seem to stop them from getting happy. They buy a new bigger house and a car. They drive to work, he drops her at work and then goes to his work. Love blooms to heights and world is jealous of their love.

Few years in marriage, they decide to have a child in their life, but may be the jealousy of world, cost them high. 2 years from the decision to have a child, but nothing worked out. They consult the doctor, everything is normal, but somehow it doesn’t happen. Biology you see, it doesn’t help you sometimes. Now you have all the aunties suggesting you tips for conceiving a baby. They somehow get this magical skills of becoming a doctor. Somehow you become a point of question, every time your friends have a baby or at some birthday party. All your cousins start to make plans to join their kids in school. They don’t say much to you, but everyone kind of notices it.

Now, what happens of the love. Will Love survive the tough test of life, which no one knows the solution to. It is more of now, left to Luck ! The man in this case, loves her beyond point, but the pressure from life, family and society, dilutes his believes. His love trembles and he is confused. Life goes on, but in the weak moments of confusion, he questions his Love. He cannot understand, what he can do in this situation. He cannot ask her or blame her, lest she will be broken. He doesn’t know whom to blame. When things get heavy on his head and heart, it becomes difficult to breath. But Love Lasts, until something terrible happens.

The woman in this case, loves him as much. But the situation is even more painful forΒ  her than anyone else in the family. She cries a lot in moments of loneliness. She cannot talk to her friends, because they are all now in different frame of life. They sympathize her, which she doesn’t want. She wants to see positive ray of light, as if nothing of this actually matters. But nothing seems to console her, because every where she goes, she somehow realizes the fact, she can’t conceive. Her heart melts, when she hears a cry of a child. Her chest pains, when she sees a mother feed her child. The woman in her, cannot stop feeling the missing element in her. But Love Lasts, until something terrible happens.

As they continue to live life, immense pressure succumbs them from all side and if one of them loses calm, it all turns nasty as shit. What happens then on is the fights, arguments, blames, heartbreaks and so on.

Love goes beyond anything. When you vow, to be together in good or bad, you must. When you mean what you say and if you stand for it, you know, you will survive whatever happens. However sad you may be, however broken you may be, inside of your heart, even if it is melted, you know it still loves your Wife and you should continue to do so, whatever the situation is or will come !

What is your say on this – A Man whose Wife Can’t Conceive ?


57 thoughts on “Social Dilemma – A Man whose Wife Can’t Conceive

  1. Feelings of insecurity often seep into our relationships. And social pressures don’t help. But it’s precisely in phases like this one, one has the choice to catch the bull by the horns and deal with negative feelings recognising that they have no basis in reality. Situations like this one can be a blessing in disguise and an opportunity, if you have the faith, to rise to a higher love.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for sharing wise words.

      A times like this isn’t the mind confused, how does one then hold their conscience ?

      Doesn’t it break the woman in question to see the world fall apart ?

      Doesn’t it disappoint the man to be so helpless in situations like this ?


      1. I’m sure it does. But dealing with a problem means that you recognise that despair or helplessness are feelings. And we, as human beings are capable of handling the feelings we experience. To see things in their correct proportion is the art of living.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. (I thought I’d read up on this post as well :p).

    I personally can’t imagine what both the man and woman are going through, but I also can’t imagine not searching for another solution if I had an infertile partner or would be unable to conceive myself (I’m thinking adoption or spending lots of time with your nieces and nephews). If you love someone so much you are willing to spend the rest of your life with them, you have two sets of shoulders to take on the world instead of one. Communication is key, I believe that whatever comes your way you’ll be able to face it together, as long as you talk about it.

    By the way, I love how you keep throwing social dilemmas at us! Keeps my mind working πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Well as long as your mind keeps working, my job is done.

      Thanks for your feedback and appreciate you going through the post and putting yourself in context.

      Communication is definitely a key and when two people decide and believe strongly to be together forever, I think they should. There will be rough times, but they should learn to patch it up.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi there – thanks for reading my post which led me to your site, this post.

    I cannot imagine what it must be like to want to but cannot, but I do know of at least two women who struggled with the same issue. One is Rachel, the other Hannah. The story of what they both did in the Bible, Genesis 29 & 30 is Rachel’s story. I Samuel 1 is Hannah’s story. Ultimately they had to look to God.

    I hope the reading gives you hope in God. It doesn’t matter whose issue it may be.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I notice that in your culture you have the same idea as in the Greek one where we fear people’s jealousy and think it can harm as like karma or the evil eye can. This is what I deduce when you say rhey couldn’t conceive because of the jealousy of other people! Interesting post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well there is a lot of similarity between India-Greece and Indians-Greek. I am glad you could notice and understand.

      “when you say rhey couldn’t conceive because of the jealousy of other people!”

      I am not sure though what you meant by this.


  5. Miracles can always happen the thing is to never give up. My second husband came with a son and daughter. We lost two of our own but found that the children he had were enough. We have love and that is just fine for us.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Lovely post bhanu,in fact i’ve seen my frenz in such is an imp part but more imp is the love between husband n wife.. We’v come across many casew wherein women have conceived after 8-10 yrs n now with science growing opp have increased. So what matters is just to have faith in love & let it bloom under all circumstances.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly. You get the gist.
      It is all about patience and more so over not losing it in a way that it breaks the relationship.

      The pressure is immense and it clouds the vision, but when love thrives the time of waiting, I believe that is an amazing example for the future generations.

      Thanks for feedback, totally appreciate it to understand what I wanted to talk about πŸ™‚


  7. Hm, I can give you a true to life input about this post, Sometimes in a relationship it is not always about Love. There are uncertainties comes and you cannot blame whose side is fault because definitely no one likes to be that way. If for the man having child is important, same way to the woman. But what if this thing happen? For me as a woman, it is up to the husband to stay beside the girl he choose to marry because if he truly loves his wife there are so many ways to have a child. If the man choose to separate or blame the girl, I guess their is no reason to stay in a relationship. It is not her fault not to conceive, and no one has the right to blame her.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. If biologically the couple can’t bear a child, they should go for adoption. The adopted child won’t be their blood, but its just a matter of time. Every child is unique and god’s creation. I know, society is the bitter part, but its better to get out of pain and pressure and love someone as their own.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. I can understand the situation. All they need now is support for each other and not blame each other. I know motherhood is like a rebirth to woman but yeah sometimes in this situation they need to be patient. Hell with society who points fingers. All they know is to do only this . love shouldn’t get affected by this..

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Interesting, everyone assumes it is the wife’s medical issue. Would the comments or thoughts be different if the medical situation proved to be the husbands infertility? But most of the comments I agree with, marriage is supposed to be for better or worse, in sickness and in health… for both husband and wife. I just found your blog, Thank you for reading my poem! πŸ™‚ I look forward to reading more of your work, Namaste, Michelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, it is definitely a case scenario for next post. But I wanted to showcase how it feels when the above scenarios happen. Since it doesn’t say that woman can’t Conceive, though the title says so. In my content, I say that they are not able to fertilize for whatever biological reasons, but both partner male n female are fertile enough. It doesn’t happen

      When it is a case of medical limitations, when it is declared medically, then it is a completely different scenario.

      But again, I clarify, I don’t mean project that it is a wife’s issue.

      Thank you for your words πŸ™‚
      Glad to connect πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  10. God Bhanu ….REALLY felt the emotion in this post ….life deals us a sh..t hand sometimes ….and these things are a real test on relationships ….in my marriage we were fortunate to have children but other things occurred which REALLY …I feel …should have brought us together but tore us apart …very sad ….I really hope you and your wife can work through everything ….God bless you both …and Thankyou for stopping by my humble little blog:)

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I know what you mean there is no solution but you have to continue. You just gotta accept that not everyone is meant to have children and even though some of those that can shouldn’t. Its one of the most heart wrenching situations you can deal with.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Really ? It already fails the unconditional clause where child adoption is brought into.

      But yes a lot of them would already suggest to go for adoption, but this is not declared by Doc that they can’t have child ever, it is a matter of luck now, even then do you think they will think of child adoption ?

      Is it even necessary ? What about the woman – One experience of life that is left to chance, if they adopt, she will never be able to know if she would have become pregnant ?


  12. It seems as if you have a grand passion withheld inside of your writing, keep that up. As long as you’re passionate about what you’re speaking about, nothing else matters. You’ll be inspiring many.

    Liked by 1 person

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